Iran says Obama's offer to talk shows US failure

US President Barack Obama's offer to talk to Iran shows that America's policy of "domination" has failed, the government spokesman said on Saturday.

"This request means Western ideology has become passive, that capitalist thought and the system of domination have failed," Gholam Hossein Elham was quoted as saying by the Mehr news agency.

"Negotiation is secondary, the main issue is that there is no way but for (the United States) to change," he added.

After nearly three decades of severed ties, Obama said shortly after taking office this month that he is willing to extend a diplomatic hand to Tehran if the Islamic republic is ready to "unclench its fist".

Well that little bit of diplomacy was just as successful as we had predicted. What's next, Dear Leader? Send them our lunch money and see if they leave us alone?

New Weapons Technology for Iran

Once again the capitalist in me has taken over. I am in negotiations to team up with an obviously ingenious poster on LGF who goes by the sobriquet “Occasional Reader”. Our project encompasses selling weapons technology to Iran.

Sparked by Iran’s radar-evading torpedoes, we’ve gone to the basement and engineered a non-ferrous subsonic ballistic munitions paired with an environmentally sound bio-fueled launching mechanism to create Iran’s most perfect weapons system to date. I’ll keep everyone posted on our progress.

(Psssstttt! Barry – if you want to keep this technology “in house” so to speak, give me a ring. We can work a discounted rate and you can debut this baby the next time someone questions your abilities to protect this great country of ours)


(Special thanks to OR who came up with the ballistics munitions bit)